6 Tips to Help You and Your Preschooler Adjust During the First Days of School

I remember when I took my now 9-year-old daughter to preschool for the first time. She was a happy, energetic social butterfly but I had read so many books and blogs on what I should expect during the first few days at school that I became a ball of anxiety. Would she cry and hold my leg, begging me not to leave her? Would she be scared or upset? How could I help my precious little girl get through such a major life event?

As it turned out, I was making a mountain out of a grain of sand. My daughter was a bit timid at first but then she was eager to go play with the other kids. On the other hand, I was an emotional wreck, pulling her back to me for more hugs, kisses, and promises that I would be back soon. After a few minutes of me making a scene, she calmly patted my cheek and said "Don't worry mommy, I'm Ok. I want to play. Are you okay?"

When I said I was okay and that she could go meet her new friends, she was off like a rocket to the nearest group of kids playing with blocks. I stood outside of the classroom looking through the window as she played, completely oblivious that I was there and that this whole process was supposed to be a big deal.

Although my little one didn't seem to have any issues with the new environment, I know for many parents, quite the opposite is true, which is why I have a few tips that can help your preschooler (you, too mom & dad) adjust to the new routine.

TIP 1: DON’T RUSH THROUGH THE MORNING.

Get everyone up at a reasonable hour so that you won’t have to hurry your child through breakfast or risk being late. After all, no one likes to race through the school morning routine – especially on the first days.

TIP 2: ARRIVE FASHIONABLY EARLY.

This way, your little one can slowly settle in before the real action starts. He’ll also get more face time with the teacher - which will be tougher to do once all the other kids are there.

TIP 3: BRING A COMFORT OBJECT.

If the preschool allows it, let your child bring along her favorite stuffed animal (or blanket, or whatever object does the trick) so the new setting doesn’t feel so scary. Before long, your child will feel comfortable, allowing her teacher to put the comfort object to the side.

TIP 4: PUT ON A HAPPY FACE.

Anxiety may be eating you up inside, but don’t let your child see it because nerves are highly contagious. When your child sees that you’re upbeat and you look confident – the transition from home to preschool will be smooth and he will feel upbeat and excited too.

TIP 5: HANG AROUND, BUT DON’T HOVER.

Many preschools let (or even encourage that) parents stay in the classroom for all or part of the first few days. If this is allowed, try to stay a bit - keeping a distance away from your child allowing her to explore her new surroundings. Your goal is to let the teacher take over so you can get on with your day.

TIP 6: KEEP GOOD-BYES SHORT AND SWEET.

When it's time for you to make an exit, hold back your tears a little longer (smile!) give your new preschooler a hug, and let him know when you’ll be back (“I’ll pick you up after lunch” or whenever you plan on picking her up). Then leave and don’t linger because he can’t get on with his day until you do. Finally, no matter how tempting, never sneak out when your preschooler is looking the other way as it will make him feel insecure and less trusting.

Just remember, it’s common for kids to have a difficult time separating, however, chances are she’ll be fine five minutes after you walk out the door. If it’s taking a while for your little one to adjust, don’t panic –  preschool teachers and their assistants have seen it all and they know just what to do, so ask his teacher for help. You’ll be pleasantly surprised at pickup seeing your child very happy and busy!